A Meaningful Life

Let’s begin with the ancient Greek proverb: “Know thyself.”

With all appropriate humility, I hope what follows will help someone do just that.

·         You are infinitely valuable.

o    You are what you are, and in your innermost heart, you are good.  Accept yourself.  Love the person you are. 

o    You are also flawed.  You sometimes do or think bad things, even though you know that you shouldn’t.  That is part of what it means to be human.  Love yourself in spite of your own flaws.  Never stop trying to make yourself better, though.

·         Other persons are also valuable. 

o    In your innermost being, you are no better and no worse than anyone else.  This is the meaning of “created in the image of God.”  It is also the meaning of “all men are created equal.”

·         You do not have to prove yourself to anyone, but you do have to respect others if you want to be respected.  You do not have to prove yourself to anyone, but you do have to cooperate, if you want to experience peace and harmony, to have a fulfilling life.

·         Accepting the flaws within yourself (and we all have them) is a necessary prerequisite to self-improvement.

o    You are worthwhile and worthy, but you will never be perfect. 

o    You are better than most people at some things.  Other individuals are better than you at some things.  It’s okay to admit this.

o    Humility is an admirable trait.  Its presence means you understand your place in the big scheme of things.

o    No one ever got to be an expert at anything without understanding his or her need to work, learn, practice, and improve.

·         Others do not have to prove themselves to you.

·         If you want someone to do something or give something or behave a certain way for you, then you must be prepared to do or give something in return.  This does not involve your ontological self.  It is just the way people interact.  This is particularly true with regard to employment. 

o    You need to earn a living.  You need to keep your boss (or your customers/clients) satisfied in order to earn that wage (or profit).  There is nothing demeaning in keeping your boss/customer/client satisfied.  On the contrary, good work is ennobling.

o    You have to prove worthy of the trust you want people to place in you and in your business.  This is not eschatology.  It is economy, sociology, ethics, good interpersonal relationships.

o    If you fail to put others first, whether in personal relationships or business, they will not do or give back in the way you want.

·         Your parents owe you the best upbringing they can give you.

o    As a child or young adult, you are not normally in the best position to judge this.  You do not have the wisdom or life experience to know whether they are succeeding or failing, except in cases of extreme neglect or abuse.  Do not judge them.

o    Remember one of the forgotten Ten Commandments:  “Honor your father and mother.”  They deserve your respect.

o    If and when you have children, you will owe them your best, no matter what price you have to pay to deliver. 

§  They will be more important than your own comfort, more important than your own life.  Anything less is irresponsible and abhorrent.

§  The parent who cares more for his or her own comfort than for his or her children is immoral and unworthy.

§  This is the most important obligation in your life.

·         No one else owes you anything.

o    No one has to give you a job.

o    No one has to love you.

o    No one has to listen to your opinion.

o    Every other thing you have is a blessing from God and/or a gift from others.

·         If you are true to yourself, considerate of others, and if you love people, you may expect that a few people also will love you.  This is not a guarantee, but is likely.  Work on it.

·         In almost every case, coercion and manipulation of others is wrong.  Persuasion, on the other hand, is a skill worth learning.

·         Old proverb: “If you want peace, work for justice.”

·         Trying to be happy is less fulfilling than trying to do the right thing, than loving other people, than knowing you have done something good for someone you love, your family, the community or the world.

o    Happiness is a side-effect of a life being well lived.

o    Happiness is created from within, or received from others who share it voluntarily.  The kind of happiness that comes from circumstances or things feels good for a moment and is gone.  It is an illusion.

·         You will never have everything you want.  That’s okay.  If all your desires were satisfied, you would have nothing to look forward to, and that would be depressing.

·         If you are alive, you should be learning.  If you are alive, you should be improving yourself.  If you are alive, you should be helping others to the best of your ability.

·         Loving other people is the key to a happy and fulfilling life.  You will discover more joy when you are focused on loving others than in any other activity you may undertake.  When your goal is to help another find happiness, you are likely to find happiness yourself.  When your goal is to help another become a better person, you are likely to become a better person yourself.

·         Your attitude, whether positive or negative, will in most cases determine your happiness.

o    The world can be a difficult place.  The world can be a wonderful place.  Sometimes, whether life is beautiful or dismal depends on the way the wind is blowing. 

o    Most of the time, whether life is beautiful or dismal depends on whether we are facing the right direction.

o    Old proverb:  “A man of fifty is responsible for his own face.”  Think about it.

o    Most people get to live the life they themselves choose and create.

·         You are wonderfully made, and the one who created you, loves you.  Really.

o    No matter how badly you’ve messed up, you are never beyond the love of God. 

o    This is true, whether you believe it or not.

o    Old lyric: “People who need people are the luckiest people in the world.”  Is it trite, or is it profound?  You decide.

·         This is not all wisdom.  It’s just some thoughts that I hope will help you.

·         I could be wrong about some of these things.  They have been ringing true for me all my life, though.

·         One final pair of thoughts, from ancient scripture.  They come from thousands of years apart, but in my mind, they belong together.  They say the same thing in two different ways, I think, and what they say is something we too often forget.

o    “God created man in His own image.”

o    “The Kingdom of God is within you.”

o    Ponder, understand, and find your true context within our human family, our world, the great universe, and the love of God.

“This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.”

-          Shakespeare