Found headline: ‘17 Signs You're Having a Migraine'
Do we really need a list? Who really needs a list of 17 signs?
From what I've seen of them, one sign is probably enough for anyone suffering from a migraine.
I didn't read the article under the headline because I have never in my life met anyone who was having a migraine and didn't know it. Think about it. When was the last time you heard anyone say, "What a wonderful, lovely morning! The sun is shining, the birds are singing. If only some kind doctor or enlightened journalist would tell me how to be sure I’m not having a migraine, life would be perfect."
But obviously someone thinks specifying a bunch of characteristics that seem obvious to us ordinary slobs is important. It was important to the persons who wrote and published this article. Maybe they are smarter than we are.
So in the interest of broadening our understanding of a plethora of interrelated symptomatic minutia, I decided to dispense with the article and give you my own list of signs you’re having a migraine. To save you time, I have condensed the list from 17 signs to 10, which should be plenty for anyone.
SIGNS YOU'RE HAVING A MIGRAINE
1. Your head hurts.
2. Your head hurts really really bad.
3. Light makes you hurt.
4. Sound makes you hurt.
5. You hurt so bad, you are nauseous
6. Your hair, teeth, or bones hurt.
7. You hurt so bad, you pray to fall into a coma until it stops.
8. Breathing makes you hurt.
9. Your heartbeat makes you hurt.
10. You hurt so much, you can’t remember your name.
That, friends and aspiring medical students, is how you know you have a migraine. Now go back to your dark room and recover. You can thank me later.
Gryphem
Do we really need a list? Who really needs a list of 17 signs?
From what I've seen of them, one sign is probably enough for anyone suffering from a migraine.
I didn't read the article under the headline because I have never in my life met anyone who was having a migraine and didn't know it. Think about it. When was the last time you heard anyone say, "What a wonderful, lovely morning! The sun is shining, the birds are singing. If only some kind doctor or enlightened journalist would tell me how to be sure I’m not having a migraine, life would be perfect."
But obviously someone thinks specifying a bunch of characteristics that seem obvious to us ordinary slobs is important. It was important to the persons who wrote and published this article. Maybe they are smarter than we are.
So in the interest of broadening our understanding of a plethora of interrelated symptomatic minutia, I decided to dispense with the article and give you my own list of signs you’re having a migraine. To save you time, I have condensed the list from 17 signs to 10, which should be plenty for anyone.
SIGNS YOU'RE HAVING A MIGRAINE
1. Your head hurts.
2. Your head hurts really really bad.
3. Light makes you hurt.
4. Sound makes you hurt.
5. You hurt so bad, you are nauseous
6. Your hair, teeth, or bones hurt.
7. You hurt so bad, you pray to fall into a coma until it stops.
8. Breathing makes you hurt.
9. Your heartbeat makes you hurt.
10. You hurt so much, you can’t remember your name.
That, friends and aspiring medical students, is how you know you have a migraine. Now go back to your dark room and recover. You can thank me later.
Gryphem
No comments:
Post a Comment
Everyone with something to say is welcome to post comments on Gryphem. Keep it positive if you can. Keep it clean and respectful always.